Monday, June 14, 2004
Death!
I meant to say "Dearth" there, but I thought I'd just tease you for a moment!
Haha, I know there are lots of HEATHENS who would rejoice to hear news of the Death of the Parsnip! I laugh in your faces! You will never bring down the Parsnip!
Today has been an amusing day. I decided to pay a visit to Parliament Square. As usual, there were a number of stalls set up for pro-fox hunting, anti-fox hunting, and pro-anti-aunties-for-pros-party. I despite anyone who tries to make prostitutes out of people's aunties. It is not appropriate!
But I decided that it would be a good idea to set up my own stall. I promptly purchased a wallpaper pasting table, the type on which one sees wares being peddled at a car boot sale, and adorned it with my favourite variety of parsnips.
The draw of my table was magnetic!
All around many people came to view the Parsnip at His Full Glory! I posed for many pictures in numerous "FEAR THE PARSNIP!" gestures for the tourists. They look very dramatic, but I am not allowed to post links to them, as I suspect my enemies may try to use them against me in their own propaganda. I must not fall to their level!
Shortly afterwards I was arrested for public order offences.
People just aren't ready to accept a The Naked Parsnip (i.e. "His Full Glory!") just yet.
UPDATE: I have been informed by my solicitor that the aforementioned pictures may be published after all. On disgusting filthy websites, filled with filth about dirty crack ho's sticking parsnips in All The Wrong Orifices!
Shudder! My thoughts go out to all of my Parsnippery Brethren who suffer such fates!
Haha, I know there are lots of HEATHENS who would rejoice to hear news of the Death of the Parsnip! I laugh in your faces! You will never bring down the Parsnip!
Today has been an amusing day. I decided to pay a visit to Parliament Square. As usual, there were a number of stalls set up for pro-fox hunting, anti-fox hunting, and pro-anti-aunties-for-pros-party. I despite anyone who tries to make prostitutes out of people's aunties. It is not appropriate!
But I decided that it would be a good idea to set up my own stall. I promptly purchased a wallpaper pasting table, the type on which one sees wares being peddled at a car boot sale, and adorned it with my favourite variety of parsnips.
The draw of my table was magnetic!
All around many people came to view the Parsnip at His Full Glory! I posed for many pictures in numerous "FEAR THE PARSNIP!" gestures for the tourists. They look very dramatic, but I am not allowed to post links to them, as I suspect my enemies may try to use them against me in their own propaganda. I must not fall to their level!
Shortly afterwards I was arrested for public order offences.
People just aren't ready to accept a The Naked Parsnip (i.e. "His Full Glory!") just yet.
UPDATE: I have been informed by my solicitor that the aforementioned pictures may be published after all. On disgusting filthy websites, filled with filth about dirty crack ho's sticking parsnips in All The Wrong Orifices!
Shudder! My thoughts go out to all of my Parsnippery Brethren who suffer such fates!
